Who doesn't have 10 or 15 extra min.....

Well here we go....I am home in Provo, I still call it home because it is where I pretty much grew up, I am by myself here in my parents house, my mom and dad went up to Idaho Falls to a wedding, and Shad went up with Shantell to Boise to visit Shaylor and Jackie....we were all going to go, but me and the boys are sick, and I don't want Jackie to have to deal with Rowdy being sick because of us....so here we are alone at the house and I love doing absolutely nothing, I woke up at 10, fed the boys breakfast, we played and then we all took naps, Tae is still asleep while I blog right now and Taren is in his bumbo....hanging out with me....ok now he is back down for a nap and Tae is up....that is how it goes sometimes, I put one down the other gets up, then I get Tae down and Taren gets up, sometimes I am lucky if they both go down at the same time....like today, I got to sneak in a nap. Anyway that is the point of my title....whenever I put Tae down for a nap or to bed, if I just walk in there and set him in the pack in play or crib, he always cries for a little bit, but.....if I take 10 or 15 min and we sing some songs and say a prayer together...he goes down and not a peep, not crying at all....so I have been committed to make sure that I take that time before putting him down to sleep, because come on...who doesn't have 10 or 15 min? It helps us bond and spend quality time together, and now Tae sings the songs with me, and if the songs have hand gestures like popcorn popping on the apricot tree or itsy bitsy spider, he does them with me I love it! He says new words everyday, he will be full on talking before I know it. He still wants to do everything with Shad, it is constantly "where's daddy" and "no mamma, daddy help.." Shad became his favorite overnight, what can I say I am out of the club, I don't have the right parts....on another note Taren is about done nursing, we do it once in the morning and once at night and my milk is getting lower and lower, I can hardly pump anything....it always happens sooner than I want it to, this happened with Tae around the same time.....I have taken supplements this time with Taren to try and increase my milk supply, and it has helped, but now I just can't get him to nurse enough to keep it going, so I am going to stop, we made it 6 months and I am happy about that, I wanted to go 8 months with Taren, but oh well. He is eating more solid food these days I would say it is 40% food, 40% formula and then 20% nursing. I switched Tae to raw milk when he was between 8-10 months and he has done great on it, so I only plan on using formula for Taren till he is about 8 or 9 months old and then I will transition him to raw milk as well. Redmond farm really has the best, even though it is hard to get, it is worth it. Taren is rolling all over the place and will figure out sitting up and crawling soon, it is fun to watch him grow up. Shad's knee is getting a lot better, he still has to be careful, and it is really stiff sometimes, but it is slowly getting more mobility and he bikes a lot with Mony to help it keep strengthen, he will be going on hunts soon, hopefully he is successful with all 3, then our freezer will be overflowing with organic wild game once again, we still have a bit of elk, and it will be nice to have it full again. I am planning on working full time soon, just trying to see what my options are first and what will fit best for me at Second Nature Entrada. We want to be debt free by the time I start graduate school. Well there you go that is our family in a nutshell and what has been happening. :)

and I am over it.....

New moods...new songs....so I am over it and moving on, it feels good. I have been consistently going to the gym these days and am loving it, my body is changing and it feels good to get into shape, I have been great with my nutrition as well. Life is good, what can I say, I am in between working for a little and just enjoying being home with the boys, sleeping in, having great times with friends and family...what more could you really ask for in life?

Great Song

So I have found a song for the current place I am in right now, isn't that just great when a new song comes along and emcompasses how you feel? I love this song and it is a great one about how I feel about a relationship I have had recently changed...and no....this one has nothing to do with Shad :) We are great!

so this song was the new Pink song called So what, I loved it and it served for a time.....

Back from the Field.....and lots to talk about

So I went into the field last minute for 4 days from Tuesday to Friday, it was great as usual, lots of fun and overall pretty easy....I have lots to say and catch up about....but I am tired and at least wanted to post a fun picture and let everone know a great blog is shortly coming....:) This is Taren eating one of his first official solid food meals...they grow up soo fast!

Well there you go.....

So I find myself thinking about change and about relationships and well humans in general.....I think its great for relationships with people to change, whether in a positive direction or a, "we are no longer going to hang out direction", it is a natural part of being in relationships, you start by finding things in common, or ideas or whatever it is that initially sparks any relationship and then it is either nurtured and grows and then changes as a product of the nurturing or people make different choices and it changes, finding less in common, or less to relate about, or lets be honest.....we get deeper and deeper with a person and then get to a place where we realize we would or wouldn't be friends with someone when more of their character is revealed. And certainly no relationship is in vain or needs to be labeled as wasted time, because we learn so much about ourselves in relationships and what we can continue to work on and better in ourselves, I guess its just too bad that that comes at a price sometimes, what I mean by that is, the hard part of change in a relationship, the letting go, the moving on if that is what is needed, or the sticking with it, because it is worth it, the ties run too deep....or more is to be learned from each other, either way it really is too bad when people can't move on or talk about things in a way that Christ would, and that is where my thoughts go about humans in general, how finicky and reactive we can be at times....it really is silly when you look at the big picture to ever leave or move on or "change" the relationship in hurt and anger....I guess that is what I am finding with my own relationships...having less expectations and more gratitude about what I can learn about myself by knowing and spending time with someone, because in the end, no matter how well I think I know someone.....I will never know them like they know themselves, and I can really only ever work on myself, I mean I believe I can influence others....and I can only change myself. I think when people want to start making choices, "good" or "bad" they want to surround themselves with people who support their choices so they don't have to feel bad about their behavior, whether good or bad, but I am talking more about "poor" choices here, and you want to surround yourself with people who share your same values, if that changes you are going to change your friends, it is inevitable...(I think this also happens in any kind of relationship by the way), and so there in lies my thoughts.....I get why relationships change and that there are always two sides to every story...I find myself moving to a place of not who can I be closest to, but how can I be grateful to spend quality time with people who help make me a better person and how can I savor those times, whether with friends/family or a spouse....So change is GREAT and I am glad I have had recent experiences with some of my relationships changing, it has challenged my perceptions about expectations, what really matters, and ultimately how to have more gratitude and less judgement and less expectation.

Back on the Fitness train....and I am really serious this time!

So I have started lifting and running again, but not just a little and light weights....full blown intensity, intensity, and well more intensity...I listened to this great audio book called ultimate fitness....and i LOVED it! I knew it would inspire me...and you know what I really LOVED about it...it was written by a reporter, we all know reporters ask a TON of questions...so she started asking them about fitness, what are the best ways to get in shape, why does one thing work and not another, I like her book because it is based on her researching every question you could think of and finding the roots to why certain things started in the fitness world, like the HR formula...which by the way is kinda BS! I know right...what am I saying...that is only one of the things that totally blew me away! That standard formula and where it came from I can't remember where it came from...I will have to listen to that again, but I do remember it was never meant to be standardized all across the board, Polar HR monitor company took that formula and did it to sell more HR monitors....I mean its good to know your HR and what your max and you min is, but just subtracting 220 from your age and then multiplying it by 80% or the low end 60% may not be what the high end of your HR is, the best way to test is to get on a treadmill, sprint till you cannot take another step and then moniter what your high is then.....bottom line of the book....you gotta be working out hard enough to sweat, and I am not talking just a nice light sweat, I am talking heart pounding, face dripping, hey I need to clean the machine off for sure when I am done sweat! That goes with weights too, be lifting enough to have a hard time finishing 3 sets....meaning each set is hard to do, and no us women will not ever bulk up and look like men if we lift hard and intensely, it just won't happen. Exercising vigerously for at least 45 min a day minus sundays at least for me....with high intensity....well she says in the book that is the kind of exercise that changed bodies and really tones them out and droppes lbs and body fat! So here I come hard intensity fitness train....now it is all relative...how hard I can train now won't be as hard as I could push myself in a month or so....so I know I still gotta be patient...but I have decided that these last few months of the year before I turn 30, are the months where I will get into the best shape of my life and then maintain that the rest of my life so that I can be an active spry grandma someday! Plus lets be honest, even although I am back to "normal" pre pregnancy weight, I miss the hard toned muscles I used to have and the lower body fat rate....so I am sick of talking about it and kinda trying, I am jumping in and hitting the fitness train with all I have got.....here I come the best shape of my life...and don't worry I will be posting pictures! So you can all cheer me on....oh and I forgot, of course nutrition is a HUGE deal when trying to get in the best shape of my life, so other than thanksgiving day and christmas day....it is oatmeal and other yummy grains, apples, watermelon and other delicious fruits, chicken, elk, fish and lots of veggies and salads for me....:) I am SO excited, plus I have really decided I miss that feeling I get when I leave the gym having worked really hard, or biking around town with the boys and wanting to just come home and enjoy the workout buzz...it relieves my stress, I have more energy and I love how my body ends up looking....so really why wouldn't I jump on the fitness train for those type of dividends! I will keep you updated! Tune in for more...1 picture to start, one of my favorite taken almost a year after Tae was born....I look great and I want to feel that way everyday from NOW ON! :)

What the Flip!!

So I have decided since this morning, and maybe this weekend because the group was crap that I am in this over sensitive over reactive vortex...how did I get sucked in? It must have snuck up on me, I am getting OUT! seriously I just need to chill out! Let things mull around in my brain for a sec and then just relax.....

Some fun pictures that go with the entry below

Here are some fun pics I had a hard time attaching with the below entry...

HOME again....

Well I am out of the field once again...I sure do feel like I have been working a lot lately, and it is paying off...literally....we are finally catching up on all of our bills and torn ACL and having a baby bills....GOOD TIMES! It is worth it! I love coming home and seeing my sweet boys...I get such big smiles and hugs....I have decided that as much as I would like to make it to at least 8 months nursing, that I will probley only make it to 6...my milk is so low even now and that is with taking a supplement that is supposed to help boost it...so I am still going to try...but not be too upset if I only make it to 6 months....on another note...I had a great time in the field, I always get such positive feedback about how much I am helping those I work with, and lately I have worked with some really fun people...it makes working and camping and staying away from my boys a little easier....Taren is now rolling over and Taegyn well he is as curious and busy as ever and soo much fun! I am glad to not have school right now, and I do feel like when I am not in the field I am still working a lot doing stuff for Matt, I have mulled around working full time again soon and that may happen sooner than later now....we will see! All around I look at my life and feel so blessed. I have a great husband and 2 amazing boys...I have met some really great new friends and reconnected with old ones...I love my job when I mentor and I LOVE playing with my boys! Life is good, it can't hurt that my favorite season of the year is coming up, it is already in provo, but takes longer to get here in st. george.... and that would be FALL! The smell, the colors of the trees the nice cool weather that is neither too hot or too cold....I LOVE IT, plus you get to wear hoodies and cute jackets....my main staple fall wear! I am also super grateful at the progress we have made on the house so far, slowly but surely....well its late, and I couldn't sleep before and now i feel like I could...I will not miss windy flappy keep me up all night tarps tonight....tonight I get soft, warm bed cuddling up to the man I love most! :)